Thursday, May 21, 2009

200 posts ....

And now I am back tracking...


up to 228 today...

Very annoyed and know it's because I am stressing about the move...

I ate 3 donuts yesterday... THREE!

When will it click that it's not ok to eat crap...

I had come so far.. down to 215 a little over a month ago.. what the hell!

Am getting my water in and tracking on spark... will go for a walk tonight...
Off to DC this weekend.. will try to not go food crazy...

Sunday, May 17, 2009


needless to say... the weekend was NOT healthy...

a whole pint of ben and jerrys
loaded waffle fries
lots of m&ms

at least the week is here and I can get back on a schedule...

epics fails on the weekends!!!


Got my new shoes today... going to break them in tomorrow!
sports bra and clip on mp3 player on the way!!
downloaded the first 4 weeks of the 5K podrunner!

This IS going to happen.. these next 2 weeks are just going to be rough and I will just do the best I can!

Friday, May 15, 2009

an ok day

The Good:
* 64 oz of water in!
* Took a walk (with a huge hill in the middle.. gah!)

Needs Improvement:
* My eating in Resturants... Out with co-workers again.. not the best choice at lunch (pasta and a small chicken parm)

It was nice to walk outside today.. the sun was out.. lilacs were blooming so it smelled great! Tomorrow I am moving more stuff to storage, so I will get a mini workout in. Spending the weekend with a friend and not sure what my food options will be but will make the best of it!

Have a great weekend!

Thursday, May 14, 2009

being honest

Today was NOT a good day... but I will be accountable for what I ate.. and use this as a reminder to not eat this way!!


2 cups of coffee w/cream and sugar

I saw a great salad on the menu but because everyone else was doing burgers.. I went for one too... a burger with cheddar cheese and bacon... and the biggest pile of seasoned fries I have ever seen (and ate!)...

bar after the work seminars... had a double G&T and maybe 5 wings
stopped at the ice cream store for a "Oh my goodness" ice cream sundae... a warmed chocolate cupcake with 2 scoops of cookies and cream ice cream, peanut butter sauce, whip cream and a cherry...

I feel so freaking CRAPPY now.. plus I am PMS'ing.. and I did not go to the gym...

I would like to break out of this crap fest habit... where I eat one "bad" food choice and I just spiral out of control the rest of the day.

I am really looking forward to being at camp this summer as we have re-vamped our kitchens and are going all organic, natural, and sustainable... I will use this as 2 1/2 month detox of crap food and will focus on HEALTHY food... BUT (!!!!) this does not give me liscense to eat crap up until June 1st... I do feel disgusting today and just plain crappy... greasy burgers and fries will do that huh?

I'd like to also get to the gym tomorrow... I haven't been to a body pump class since last week... This week has just been so freaking crazy!

So tomorrow: eat sensible and go to the gym.... you can do that... you've done it before!

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

back in the saddle again

Things I did GOOD today:
1. drank 64oz of water
2. ate a healthy lunch - salad w/chicken and red onion, an apple and walnuts
3. did a 30 minute walk, with 4 minutes of 1-minute jogs

Things I can do BETTER:
1. watch over-eating at dinner just because I worked out...
2. get another 32 oz of water in
3. push for 45 minute walk/jog tomorrow

Keeping it positive!

I bought a good, supportive, sports bra today... and also a clip on mp3 player to load the coach to 5k program on to... Went to the running store today to look at shoes.. will continue search at DSW/Foot Locker in Syracuse this weekend. Will also find a new pair of workout pants as the ones I am wearing now are falling apart!

If anyone knows of any 5k runs in the fall in the NYC area.. please let me know! My BFF T and I are going to rock a 5k this fall and are preparing for it this summer!!! Actually pretty excited about it!

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

motivational quote...

There is a way to reach the goal. You just have to decide you’re going to do it.
There are challenges, to be sure. Yet you’ve overcome challenges before and you can do it again.Decide to do it, and make the commitment. Take the necessary actions, over and over again.
If you realize your approach isn’t working, adjust it and improve it until you begin to make some progress. Then be grateful for what you’ve learned, and use it to move more quickly ahead.
Be sure to choose a goal that is truly yours. Making the goal meaningful is what makes it reachable.Creating anything of value takes a lot of good, hard, solid work.
Enjoy the journey and delight in reaching the destination.

— Ralph Marston

note to self

If they can run a full marathon on Biggest Loser... if RON can complete it w/injuries and just walking... then I can freaking lose to effin' pounds a week.. SERIOUSLY!!!

and yes.. I am a week behind on BL.. please don't tell me the results!

This is my re-commit to myself, my health, my SANITY, my fight with losing all this weight for once and for all..

My BFF T has agreed to do a 5k with me in the fall so we both have something to work towards..

There is no reason in the world why I can't lose this weight and get healthy.. NONE.
I have lost weight before
I have gained muscle before
I have even jogged for 5+ minutes before
anything is possible if you put your mind to it


Here we go!!

Sunday, May 10, 2009

why do we do it?!

Why do we consciously eat crappy food when we know its not good for us and will not help with our goals in the long run?

Seriously! I would like to hear your take on self sabotage!

This weekend contained the following:
Friday Night - Mexican and a 'i hate my ex' pint of ben and jerrys...

Saturday - I moved a TON of stuff to storage so I felt I deserved a subway sub w/chips and soad.. oh and apparently its free cookie day on saturday.. so I got a cookie.

dinner was chinese buffet and then a chocolate triffle...

Sunday - at a sensible breakfast of cereal... then moved more stuff to storage...and had french bread pizza for dinner.. plus a single serve bag of chips.. then some popcorn (was watching a movie).. and then more ice cream (I had finished the pint.. so I actually bought more tonight... just a single serve at least..)

I honestly don't get it... If I had to break it down to non-food reasons I would say stress and uncertainty. I don't have a job lined up for after the summer yet.. and I don't know where I am going.

I say I want to lose weight but I am obviously pretending since I can't seem to actually committ to it instead of just 'being interested in it'.

at one point this past week, the scale was down to 221ish... I don't expect anything great tomorrow morning but hey.. It's all my fault.. I'm the one that ate like the world was going to end!

Tomorrow ... back to eating well. Smoothies for breakfast, salads for lunch, and a sensible dinner. It's easier during the week because I have a schedule... and then all hell breaks lose on the weekend.

I hope one day I learn....

Hope you all had a good weekend!

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Back on track

These past 3 weeks have been rough. I haven't been eating well.. have made poor food choices...ate out WAY too much...

I did do better with exercise.. pushed myself in my body pump class and even climbed a mountain...

But my weight has gone up... WAY up... It jumped up 6lbs after the mountain hike last weekend.. and has stayed there since.. part of me wishes it was just muscle.. but after the way I have been eating and the emotional states I have been in.. It's probably true gain..

Today's weigh in - 226.4

This makes me sad and angry when only a few weeks ago I was so excited to be below 220... and now I have to work it all back off again. It's daunting.. it's so hard to lose weight and then to gain some back.... ugh!

I have to realize that this is a life long journey.. I'm going to have to watch what I eat and really put in some effort to be healthy and lose weight. I can't just sit back and hope for the best. I need to really work at this...

I have a month until I move down to PA for the summer... so I am giving myself a 30day (really 28 day) challenge to stick to the following goals.

1. Track food/water in sparkpeople
2. prepare foods ahead of time so I'm not stuck eating out/making poor choices
3. Body pump 2x/week, walk-jog 3x/week (at minimum)
4. focus on clean foods.. no more chips, soda, pre packaged food, candy... it's really not worth it.. and no more 'cheat' days/meals.. you really need to just stick to plan every day and not blow it on the weekends... it's not getting you anywhere..
5. watch the stress.. job hunting and moving is tough.. but it will all work out.