So .. the weekly points that were supposed to be saved for thanksgiving.. are now gone. Let me tell you why!
I wouldve been ok.. but I got a call from another student loan co. saying I owed money. I have all my loans on forbearance or defferment.. and Im really annoyed that they don't tell you when that forbearance is up. Apparently this one ended in October.. so I owe 2 months.. which obviously I cant pay.. I can't even buy food right now. SO they said either I can pay and get another form, or get the form, it takes 15 days to process (mind you my loan is 15 days past due).. but if nothing is done after 30 days it will be reported as dilinquent.. which would really suck.. so Im just going to fax the form today and pray it gets processed fast. UGH
so.. I made a gin and tonic.. then made toast w/ pb.. and as I had my first bite i even said out loud.. IM NOT EVEN HUNGRY.. but I ate it anyway... and had 2 more gin and tonics after
227.8 this morning
(Sunday - 227.4
Monday - 227.4)
Im slowly learning that food (and drink) are not going to solve my problems.. they will just make me angry with myself and upset even more. So.. I will be careful the rest of the week.. do the best I can on Turkey Day.. and brace myself for a gain on the scale but really work for a maintain.
Why do we sabotage ourselves so much.. I really need to work on the mental aspect of this.. because.. its not like its difficult to loose weight.. You eat less and get some exercise (another sore point.. I MISS THE GYM and have no $ for it : ( .... yet.. our heads get in the way.. we feel deprived, we get emotional and turn to food... It never ends. I wonder what skinny people do when they are stressed.. and do they feel deprived?